Our hosts in Huautla I wrote about a couple of blogs ago have taken at our word what we said to them in Huautla: "please come and see us when you are in town". Which seemed like the thing to say at the time, when we were their hosts enjoying their seemingly effortless hospitality. I was surprised when Inez actually showed up at our door the next time she was in town to sell her embroidered stuff, and felt a bit stupid. Dan said, "well, we invited them to come". She comes into town about every other week to sell her stuff and also to buy stuff to re-sell in her town (which is the activity that makes more money for her).
This is not to say the relationship is an even give-and-take. When we were staying with her family, I made some attempts to help in the kitchen, and was flatly refused. Here, when Inez is here, she does the dishes and helps out in many ways with total grace. She sleeps in the front room and disappears quickly in the morning to sell in the neighborhood market where I first met her, and doesn't come back to eat. She shows us stuff she bought (jewelry, shawls, etc.) to sell in Huautla and tells us where she got the deals, because she always gets deals. This way we found a jeweler in a somewhat humble part of downtown near where I bought for Mai her second earring for her newly pierced ears. I like standing in the kitchen and chatting with her, becuase she effortlessly shares what's going on in their lives, and it's fun to get to know her.
But last night the equilibrium was somewhat broken because they came late at night when I was rushing to get Joji to bed before I started 2 phone appointments with old friends/colleagues from LA to talk about my job search. It had been a long day. Dan was tired too, and had a lot of work to do. Joji refused to go to sleep after Inez and her husband Juvenal showed up, and sat on Juvenal's lap to gorge on grapes, his favorite snack. These days the weather is quite warm, at the tail end of the dry season, and it takes a while for the air to cool down, so all of us tend to be more irritable at night, tired and sweaty.
Dan ended up feeding them a little cena (dinner) and helped ready their bed while I chatted away with pals on Skypeout. I hadn't spoken to them in a long time. The next day they took off without taking breakfast, and Juvenal came back mid-day to freshen up. I asked him if they were coming back for cominda (lunch), and he said what time. After I told him when we'd be eating, I felt I shouldn't have offered because I had nothing to cook in the house, or any energy at all to cook. In this warm weather I am less inclined to spend time in the hot kitchen. So I went out shopping in the car to the supermarket to get all the stuff we needed, plus the rotiserrie chicken and a nopales salad (just like in a U.S. supermarket, except for what's in the salad). Dan got tortillas. Dan, Mai and I ate in a hurry as usual so Mai can get to her Thursday violin lesson. Juvenal and Inez showed up later and Dan fed them the same food.
Overall it really isn't a huge amount of trouble. I enjoy getting to know them, and to have people in our house who dote on our kids and are overall nice, considerate people. I realize though that "mi casa es tu casa" hospitality that they practice is WAY above the level we are able to manage. They wait on us hand and foot when we're in their house. We just can't match it, because of our cultural sensitivities, and because we just feel too busy to take care of other people, I guess. Another cultural exposure experience I never imagined I would encounter.
This is not to say the relationship is an even give-and-take. When we were staying with her family, I made some attempts to help in the kitchen, and was flatly refused. Here, when Inez is here, she does the dishes and helps out in many ways with total grace. She sleeps in the front room and disappears quickly in the morning to sell in the neighborhood market where I first met her, and doesn't come back to eat. She shows us stuff she bought (jewelry, shawls, etc.) to sell in Huautla and tells us where she got the deals, because she always gets deals. This way we found a jeweler in a somewhat humble part of downtown near where I bought for Mai her second earring for her newly pierced ears. I like standing in the kitchen and chatting with her, becuase she effortlessly shares what's going on in their lives, and it's fun to get to know her.
But last night the equilibrium was somewhat broken because they came late at night when I was rushing to get Joji to bed before I started 2 phone appointments with old friends/colleagues from LA to talk about my job search. It had been a long day. Dan was tired too, and had a lot of work to do. Joji refused to go to sleep after Inez and her husband Juvenal showed up, and sat on Juvenal's lap to gorge on grapes, his favorite snack. These days the weather is quite warm, at the tail end of the dry season, and it takes a while for the air to cool down, so all of us tend to be more irritable at night, tired and sweaty.
Dan ended up feeding them a little cena (dinner) and helped ready their bed while I chatted away with pals on Skypeout. I hadn't spoken to them in a long time. The next day they took off without taking breakfast, and Juvenal came back mid-day to freshen up. I asked him if they were coming back for cominda (lunch), and he said what time. After I told him when we'd be eating, I felt I shouldn't have offered because I had nothing to cook in the house, or any energy at all to cook. In this warm weather I am less inclined to spend time in the hot kitchen. So I went out shopping in the car to the supermarket to get all the stuff we needed, plus the rotiserrie chicken and a nopales salad (just like in a U.S. supermarket, except for what's in the salad). Dan got tortillas. Dan, Mai and I ate in a hurry as usual so Mai can get to her Thursday violin lesson. Juvenal and Inez showed up later and Dan fed them the same food.
Overall it really isn't a huge amount of trouble. I enjoy getting to know them, and to have people in our house who dote on our kids and are overall nice, considerate people. I realize though that "mi casa es tu casa" hospitality that they practice is WAY above the level we are able to manage. They wait on us hand and foot when we're in their house. We just can't match it, because of our cultural sensitivities, and because we just feel too busy to take care of other people, I guess. Another cultural exposure experience I never imagined I would encounter.
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